MANAGING STRESS THROUGH LIFE’S BIGGEST CHANGES (SOULFULLY)

2 months left in 2024.

I didn’t mean to disappear the way I did. I’ve been under so much pressure, confusion, stress, and shock over the past few months. But the last couple of weeks have been the most stressful, I can’t even begin to explain it.

We finally made the huge move—we’re out of Japan. To be honest, acknowledging that is bittersweet. But the good news is we have our place now—somewhere—a bubble—where we can disconnect and process this brand new phase together while supporting each other through the waves of culture shock.

I wrote about this a few years ago when I began my expat journey in Japan. Back then, I was alone and a completely different person. Who knew I would be where I am now, writing this newsletter while Lana (my partner) sits there doing her own thing?

Our lives have changed so much that this recent rollercoaster makes us feel overwhelmed, lost, emotional, confused, and anxious. Anyone who has ever undergone a huge change in their lives, whether moving overseas or shifting careers, would understand the phases of uncertainty and anxiety that come with it.

That doesn’t mean we aren’t excited, grateful, and content about our new life together—we’re just trying to cope with the infamous stress.

Stress and anxiety manifest in many different ways. Lana has been more emotional since moving here. She’s also had physical manifestations—unexpected allergies triggered by her new environment. Mine comes in a different form. Whenever she asks how I am, I say, “I feel like I’m just letting life happen to me. I feel lost.”

All these contribute to stress:

• The unfamiliarity
• Our physiological stress response
• Uncertainty and the loss of predictability
• Adapting to new norms and environments
• The brain’s cognitive load and emotional strain

I. UNFAMILIARITY

It sounds stupid, but we still function the Japanese way. We enter a shop and act the way we always have.

Our brains are wired to expect the same greetings, questions, and transaction flow. Our reactions to every interaction are ingrained.

I feel dumb for a somewhat significant lag when asked a question, and then I scramble to string words together a certain way.

II. PHYSIOLOGICAL STRESS RESPONSE

Our body’s “fight or flight” is activated in new environments. Major changes and new places send signals to our brains that prompt us to be in full survival mode.

This stress response releases adrenaline and cortisol, which then leads to fatigue or compromised immunity.

Physical symptoms like skin allergies that wouldn’t typically manifest under stable circumstances are attributed to that.

III. UNCERTAINTY AND THE LOSS OF PREDICTABILITY

Transitions. They strip away the predictability we rely on to feel secure. Routine (I thrive on routines) is grounding.

It’s something my brain knows how to handle without much thought. But once our routines are disrupted, our minds expend extra energy just to manage daily tasks and interactions.

This constant state of not knowing what to say or do and the state of constant vigilance, leaves us mentally and physically exhausted.

IV. ADAPTING TO NEW NORMS AND ENVIRONMENTS

Every culture and work environment comes with its set of social norms, expectations, and communication styles.

I feel like I’ve been transported back to 2021 when everything from how people greeted each other to workplace traditions differed from what I was used to.

And these norms add a layer of complexity. Work rhythms and “unspoken” rules beg mental recalibration—which is overwhelming.

V. THE BRAIN’S INCREASED COGNITIVE LOAD AND EMOTIONAL STRAIN

Undergoing transition or change pushes our brains to work overtime, requiring the processing of new information and stimuli.

No wonder we can’t relax because even small tasks demand more mental energy than usual.

We feel this emotional strain every day because of the need to let go of our old habits, identity, and even comfort zones.

Everything is disorienting and anxiety-inducing—but we can manage it.

5 STRESS MANAGEMENT TIPS FOR YOUR SOUL (BACKED BY RESEARCH)

TIP #1: Mindfulness & Deep Breathing Exercises

Why It Works:

• Mindfulness practices, including deep breathing exercises, are shown to lower cortisol levels (our stupid stress hormone) and reduce overall physiological stress response.
• Engaging in mindfulness can help the brain become less reactive to stress, triggering and cultivating a state of zen (the best state, in my opinion).

How to Practice:

• A simple breathing exercise (4-4-6) involves inhaling deeply for a count of 4, holding for 4, and then exhaling for 6.
• Practicing this for just a few minutes each day helps the body relax.

TIP #2: Journaling & Reflective Writing

Why It Works:

• Journaling helps to organize your thoughts, process emotions, and gain clarity during challenging times.
• Writing allows the brain to offload stress. It gives you a structured way to process complex emotions rather than letting them accumulate internally (that’s why I love it).

How to Practice:

• Journal freely, focusing on your emotions and thoughts without judgment. Let your emotions and thoughts flow onto the page.

To me, that’s Soulful Writing.

TIP #3: Physical Movement & Exercise

Why It Works:

• Physical activity releases endorphins or the natural chemicals that improve our mood.
• Exercise also decreases levels of cortisol, restoring the balance in the body after periods of heightened stress.

How to Practice:

• You don’t need a long, intense workout to experience the benefits of exercise.
• Even a brisk 20-minute walk outside or gentle stretching can help. Experiment with whatever form of movement feels enjoyable for you—the goal is consistency.

One of the best things Japan has given me? Every day was leg day. Walk to work. Walk at work. Walk home from work. Walk to the shops. Walk, walk, walk.

• If you're feeling stressed, GO FOR A WALK!

TIP #4: Sleep Hygiene for Mental & Physical Rejuvenation

Why It Works:

• Quality sleep is essential for stress management because it lets the brain rest and reset.
• Sleep deprivation can increase our cortisol levels, making it harder to cope and creating a negative feedback loop that amplifies anxiety and irritability.
• No, you don’t want that negative feedback loop. GET SOME SLEEP!

How to Practice:

• Establish a calming pre-sleep routine. Reduce screen time before bed, practice relaxation techniques, and set a consistent sleep schedule.

I found that listening to soothing music (Lofi is waving) helps me a lot.

TIP #5. Practicing Gratitude to Shift Perspective

Why It Works:

• Gratitude helps shift the brain’s focus from stressors to positive aspects of life.
• This perspective shift has been shown to enhance mood, increase resilience, and reduce feelings of anxiety.
• By regularly acknowledging the magic in the mundane and ordinary, you foster a more positive outlook even in challenging times.

How to Practice:

• A simple gratitude exercise could involve listing 3 things you’re grateful for each day.
• These can be small things (like a nice cup of sake 🍶) or major ‘blessings’ (like a healthy relationship with your partner).

CONCLUSION

Soulful Living and Soulful Writing go hand-in-hand in helping us face life’s challenges with intention and grace.

Each of these strategies provides tools for handling stress, but together, they contribute to a lifestyle that values being present, self-love, and emotional awareness—the core elements of a Soulful Life.

Stay Soulful,

Jopaz