MESSY BEGINNINGS, UNEXPECTED OUTCOMES: THE BEAUTY OF TRIAL AND ERROR

I turned 32 last month. And I look back on the past couple of years and shake my head at how messily and beautifully (soulfully) things worked out for me. It wasn’t that it was perfect, far from it. It was just that it brought me to where I am now.

When I think of those three years in Japan, I think of a world that pushed me to my limits, way outside my comfort zone, and straight into compounding growth. Okay, maybe I also think of how I died 13M times when we went to The Eras Tour in Tokyo, but that’s beside the point.

Anyway, I think most people assume that their darkest moments of suffering are the worst. Because these moments are messy, painful, lonely, frustrating, and, in many cases, excruciatingly depressing.

But if we’re being honest, you and I both know how I perceive these moments. To me, they’re beautiful. No, I’m not a masochist, I just appreciate dark stuff because they teach me practical life shit.

Here’s the thing. From an early age, I learned mostly everything from the people around me—as we all do. It could’ve been dangerous. Because from an early age, I’ve watched others start something out of curiosity and then drop it out of either demotivation or disinterest.

Well, there’s nothing inherently wrong with that…until it becomes a habit that seeps into your daily life. I don’t shy away from saying my childhood hasn’t been easy. And it’s only now that I’m older that I realize how much it impacted my perspective, values, and psyche.

See, I’ve had countless moments of discomfort from new experiences, new challenges, and situations I didn’t know how to navigate—and my first impulse was always to run. I’d start talking myself out of things, convince myself why it’s best not to go on, and find an excuse that would reinforce my decision to run in the first place.

Why? Well, I’ve watched so many people easily run away from discomfort, it signaled something in my brain that it’s okay to do that. Not comfortable? Just run. You’ll find something that will click.

No! No. I’ve had to fight that early on.

I still do.

But what grounds me is a vow I told myself. From an early age, I vowed never to end up like that. Or else how do I survive? And over time, I’d learned to say ‘shut up’ to whoever that voice in my head was telling me it’s okay not to follow through.

Over time, I taught myself to get comfortable with failure. Because you can’t ‘avoid mediocrity’ without first experiencing it on your own terms. How can you say something is less than what you’re capable of when you haven’t even experienced what you’re actually capable of?

The harsh truth is you have to try and fail. Over and over. Nobody should care how many times, not even you. It’s not the failing that matters, it’s the learning that comes with it. And that’s exactly what I do for mostly anything now. I go the trial-and-error way.

Where did it lead me? That vow—to push through discomfort instead of running—shaped how I approach everything now. It’s why trial and error became my default strategy.

It’s how I launched our business with zero experience, built our website with almost no coding knowledge, and grew an audience from literally nothing (with an extra distaste for social media).

Guess what? Everything starts with zeros, failures, and losses.

That is darkness.

That is discomfort.

But that’s also life.

Your input determines your output. What you do now determines your future.

And that is both the beauty and art of triggering unexpected outcomes.

So, be messy. Be dumb at something. Learn as you go. Because it's not about being perfect. It's about knowing you will fail—but that failure is the lesson itself.

Hey. Yeah. I'm back. I know I said this the last time, but this time, I will make it a point to show up in your inbox every week again. 😎

Anyway.

Stay soulful!
Jopaz